My Triplet C-Section

My c-section was scheduled on August 31, 2016 at 35 weeks. I don’t think Jon or I slept for a week leading up to delivery day, and we both definitely didn’t sleep the night before. We just laid in bed anticipating what the birth of our daughters would be like. I finally lugged my 210 pound self into the shower and got ready, which took over an hour at this point because I got so winded and tired. We sat around not really sure what to do with ourselves, just waiting to leave. We spent some time taking a few pictures of my giant belly. I remember being mad we couldn’t get a picture where it looked as big as I felt. The pictures truly do not do it justice.

I remember feeling so incredibly proud to walk all on my own into the hospital and announce I was there to have my three babies. I never thought I would make it as far as I did.

After we arrived I put on the infamous gown and they began monitoring the babies hearts. It was probably an hour of Jon and I just hanging out in the room listening to the beats of our three little girls. Everything looked good, our doctor showed up and said hello and left to get ready. Then it was go time. All of a sudden our calm room was filled with nurses. One was shaving me, one was putting an IV in me, one was talking to me about something I definitely wouldn’t remember, and the anesthesiologist was going over the details.

This was the moment we had been waiting for, it was time to get wheeled back. Jon was not allowed in the operating room when I received my spinal block, this was one of the parts I had been extremely anxious about. The operating room was actually a lot less daunting that I had pictured, everyone was relaxed and they had the radio playing. I was moved onto the table and leaned over into the arms of the sweetest nurse and tried to curl my back as much as I could for the anesthesiologist. Once the spinal was injected I went numb instantly and was rolled over extremely fast. They prepped me in the amount of time it took for someone to get Jon to come in the room. Jon grabbed my hand and asked me if I wanted to know what was going on. Up until this moment I thought I totally would want a play by play… not so much anymore. I did not feel anything at all, not even the pulling or tugging that I had heard about.

In seconds baby A was out and screaming. It was the most surreal and incredible sound and feeling knowing one of our daughters had just made her entrance into the world. Baby B and baby C came out a minute apart, each screaming. It was music to my ears knowing our girls had arrived and were so very alive. Babies A and B (Juniper and Joan) were taken into another room to be assessed, while baby C (Fairen) was being cleaned up and assessed in the operating room. The logistics of having three babies is a little complicated so we were not able to have all three babies in the room with us and I did not even get to see them. I had requested that if possible I wanted to do skin to skin and they were able to bring Fairen over and lay her on my chest. I tried so hard to not completely lose it but having her there, breathing, and so incredibly perfect is something I will not forget.

They took Fairen to be checked out and they started sewing me up. It took less than an hour from start to finish. I was wheeled into the recovery waiting room and Jon went with the girls to the NICU. I laid there, pretty out of it from the meds, waiting anxiously for Jon to come back. He came in and let me know all the girls were doing great. The next hour the nurses kept checking on me and I kept trying to move my legs. I must have kept asking how my babies were doing because the amazing nurses somehow wheeled me into the NICU, in my bed, into the girl's room to let me see them. I finally got to see all three of my daughters. It was hard to believe that just hours before they had all been in my belly. I was scared to touch them. They looked so little, and so new. It was overwhelming seeing them all there with so many doctors and wires and machines around. I was in a sort of haze amongst the chaos. It didn’t really feel like I had met them at this point because it felt so far from an intimate moment with the bright lights and probably six people in the room. I was then wheeled to my actual hospital room where we would spend the next four days. I finally was able to eat for the first time in over 24 hours and rest a little. I still kept trying to move my legs. Jon kept going back and forth to the NICU and updating me on what was happening.

Two of our girls needed CPAP to breath for a few hours after birth and Fairen was on room air right away. I feel like saying we are blessed is the understatement of the century. Is there something beyond blessed? Because we are that.

The hospital’s lactation consultant came to our room after I was settled and helped me start pumping. I remember feeling so thankful I had more than enough colostrum right away for all three girls. It is truly incredible what a woman's body is capable of.

I can’t even remember how long it was before I made my first attempt to get up to get in the wheelchair so I could go see the girls again. It might have been 8 hours, maybe it was longer? It is a bit of a blur. The first attempt at getting up after a c-section put the pain I had been in from my pregnancy to shame. It hurts. You feel weak, you feel like any core strength you might have once had will never return, you feel like your insides are going to fall out, you feel like your incision is going to just tear right open, but above all else you feel so damn determined to see your babies it doesn’t even matter.

We continued the process of me struggling to get out of bed into the wheelchair so I could go see our girls, until it slowly got easier and easier. It was not until the next day I was able to slowly take more than just the few steps to get in the chair and I could make it to the bathroom and back. I had the girls on Wednesday and on Friday I was able to move a bit better and I was able to have my catheter removed and I was able to shower. By Saturday I was able to walk the very long hall to the NICU while holding onto my wheelchair and Sunday I could make it without the help of my wheelchair.

My recovery was not an easy one. It was far more difficult than I had imagined it would be. C-sections are so common I think it is downplayed how intense they really are.

I have to say, the recovery experience made me love my husband even more. I have never in my life felt so fragile and vulnerable both physically and emotionally. I leaned on him to make it to the bathroom, where he would help me pull down my awesome mesh underwear. He encouraged me while I shook uncontrollably from the pain and loss of blood. He proudly took my little bags of pumped breast milk to the NICU, and would get up with me every three hours while I pumped and would clean the parts. I could go on and on about how thankful I am for him, but I already feel too mushy…

I opted to stay the longest amount of time allowed in the hospital after a c-section so we would be close to the girls. I had the girls on Wednesday and we left at nearly midnight on Sunday.

Leaving without my babies was of course something I knew would happen, but it did not make it any easier. It felt so empty in our house and I couldn’t rest at all without having them close. If I knew how little sleep we would get once they were home I would have slept and rested soooo much more. Thankfully we only had to spend four nights at home without them.

I still do not feel completely healed from my surgery and I am 5 months postpartum. It feels like the muscles that had to be separated aren’t healed back together and I feel like I have no core. Only in the last month can I sit up from laying flat on my back without having to roll on my side and push up with my arms. I’m still sore, but I am so lucky I did not have any hernias or infections. Overall I am so happy and grateful for my recovery, even though it has been harder than I imagined.

There were a few side effects from my c-section that surprised me. The first was the swelling of my feet, legs and face. A few days before my delivery I started swelling really badly in my feet, so I knew I would still be swollen after surgery. I wasn’t ready for just how bad it would be. My feet were like Fred Flintstone feet and the swelling continued up to my thighs and my face. My calves looked like sausage tubes and the swelling didn’t completely go away for nearly a month. I couldn’t wear any shoes other than slippers for the first two weeks. I also lost my voice the day after delivery which was strange. My face also broke out like crazy for a few weeks.

Emotionally I felt that in a way I had been robbed of the birthing experience. Even though I knew right after we found out we were having triplets I would have a c-section and I had over 6 months to prepare mentally, I still felt a bit sad after delivery that I did not get the full experience. I had always wanted a natural birth free of pain medication and free of an epidural. At the end of the day it really does not matter how my beautiful girls made their way into the world and I was so fortunate to carry three babies as long as I did.